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Thursday, June 28, 2018
I'LL BE THERE FOR YOU...EVEN WHEN I SHOULDN'T BE...by Cheryl Pierson
Anyone here a Bon Jovi fan? I AM! LOL I love his song “I’ll Be There for You”—I’ll try to include a link here before the end of the post. This is one saying that I see a LOT when I’m editing. What’s wrong with that, you ask? Well, I edit a LOT of historical fiction. I don’t remember ever hearing it “back in the dark ages” of the 1950’s and 1960’s…so I guess maybe the 70’s was when it got to be popular. The 1970’s, not the 1870’s, y’all. I don’t believe a knight would tell his lady he’d “be there” for her…at least not for another 500-800 years, or somewhere around that, anyhow.
Here’s another one that’s jarring to me—the use of “morph” for “change”—it reminds me of those wonderful days when my son Casey was a young boy and so, so crazy about the Power Rangers. Anyone remember them? They were popular in the 1990’s. Five teenagers—two girls and three boys— (later changed to a total of six) who had the power to change from mere teens to THE POWER RANGERS! How did they accomplish this? They gave each other meaningful looks and said, “It’s morphin’ time!” And with some fancy camera work, there they were, in their Power Ranger color-coded uniforms. All…morphed…
How about the response to “Thank you.”? Truly…can you picture a knight responding with “No problem.”? No…me either. Yet, sometimes that’s the response that crops up in historical manuscripts. It doesn’t matter how politely one responds, the response has not been invented or introduced into thought or speech patterns of that time.
Another simple one that turns up a lot in response to “How are you?” is … “I’m good.” When did this phrase come into existence? I don’t ever remember this being said until only in the last couple of decades. When talking about someone else—“He’s good to go.” No…you might hear that on Blue Bloods or Law and Order, but not so much in 1860’s Indian Territory.
"Marshal Tilghman, how are you today?" "I'm good."
Here are a couple of words that tend to creep in a lot—and shouldn’t—flashback and replay. Remember what these words are really saying, what they convey to people of this day and age who are reading the stories we’re writing. A medieval knight or a drifting cowboy will have no idea what “replaying something in his mind” even means—or that he’s having a “flashback” to when he was fighting at the battle of Honey Springs. Or that he’s “flashing back” to something that might have been a sweet memory in his early years. These characters are going to just be remembering, recalling, or thinking back to something… When you use this type of modern wording that refer to contemporary actions/equipment, it’s easy to pull readers out of the story. Because my husband is such a sports fan, I can’t hear or read the word “replay” without thinking of the sports connotation it carries. Flashback—this conjures up images of Hollywood movie scenes.
Let's see the replay on that!
“Well, it’s all about you, isn’t it?” This is one that creeps in every so often, too. It “being all about” one person or another—or NOT “being all about” them is something that should never, ever, ever show up in any kind of historical writing. It’s easy to do—these contemporary sayings are so normal to us we can’t imagine NOT using them in daily conversation—problem is, it’s our job to check and double check what our characters are saying. If we don’t, they go out into the world showing that we have not “brought them up” correctly.
That reminds me—do you know the difference between being “reared” and “raised”? The standard saying used to be that “Children are reared; livestock is raised.” Those lines have blurred in modern times. I still remember my mother talking about children being “reared” and her brother “raising” cattle. She was born in 1922, so I would say that distinction has faded only during my lifetime.
RAISED
This is “picky” but it’s the sort of thing that readers will seize on—and there are certain word usages and phrases that will definitely pull me right out of a story that’s written in historical times, so I’m sure that’s true of others, as well.
These are a few of the many “uh-ohs” I see when I’m reading/editing. What are some you’ve come across?
If you are a FRIENDS tv show fan, you know that there is another “I’ll Be There for You” – the theme of the show by the Rembrandts. There’s also a Kenny Rogers song that uses that phrase. But I promised you Bon Jovi! Here he is singing “I’ll Be There for You”—a wonderful song to turn up loud and belt out when you’re driving…just remember, in historical fiction writing, we have to find another way to say this. Kinda makes me sad, but we have to wait for it to be invented.
Writing medievals, I wrestle with the fact that my characters don't speak English or French (both modern versions are quite different from the OE or medieval French. So, I was quite excited when I learned that spew, i.e. to vomit, is OE and perfectly acceptable for a character of mine to say. :-)
ReplyDeleteLOLLOL!!!! That made me laugh so hard, Keena! I have never seen anything in your work that gave me pause. I know you're always careful about what you write. I think "morph" and "bleed out" are my two "cringe-worthy" phrases when I come across them in historical writing.
DeleteMy husband had a copy editor rewrite a couple of scenes in one of his 1880's novels to include the phrase 'stay frosty'. I'm not kidding. Luckily we were able to take those out at the page proof stage. If you're not sure, more times than not you can simply do a quick internet search of the phrase with origin, and you'll have an answer of when it was first used.
ReplyDeleteOh my gosh! That's bad--made me laugh, though. Reminds me of another author who had written about "red-eye gravy" and an editor did her a favor and changed it to "overnight-stay" gravy. When she asked her about it, the editor told her she'd looked it up for a synonym as she didn't like the "sound" of red-eye gravy.
DeleteThere's something spooky going on with me. I could have sworn I made a comment about this very interesting blog, yet it's only published here today. Yet I recall thinking I hope you caught my slip in my hero's thoughts when he realized it was "all about me" and changed it. I meant to look for it but haven't found the time. Surely I didn't "dream" this? Anyway, as always, you present thought-provoking articles. I so concur that certain phrases pull one out of a story. That's why I could never cotton to Xena, the Warrior Princess because I found the modern phrasing so jarring that I was forever jerked out of historical era, and I always had a fascination for ancient Roman times. Ditto the medieval movie about a knight (forgotten the title) that was supposed to be funny, but the dialogue ruined it for me. Your examples are a strong reminder to me to be ever-vigilant with words and phrases...even though I still love the words "sassy" and "teddy bear" but can't use them in my western historicals....sigh. Thanks for the jolt of reality, Cheryl, and I look for more words of wisdom gathered from your editing experiences.
ReplyDeleteElizabeth, you probably did comment. I've posted this blog elsewhere before--so you may have already commented on it at another blog post. So glad you came by and commented (again!) I always had to laugh at Xena, too. Yeah...teddy bear...that would jerk me out of it right then and there. LOL
DeleteCheryl,
ReplyDeleteEven though I diligently check words and phrases for dates of origin, I slip-up just like we all do. However, I'm sometimes surprised at how far back a word or phrase that I think is 'modern' was actually used. (unfortunately, I can't think of an example right now lol). I had an editor/proofer want to change 'barked his shin' to 'banged his shin', because she'd never heard of the expression and apparently she didn't take the time to research it. My point here is not all editors are created equal. Just because an editor/proofer has experience and positive reviews of her/his work, doesn't mean the experience includes historical works and the nuances that accompany that genre.
Boy, isn't that the truth, Kaye! So much of editing is NOT just the punctuation and grammar, but knowing (AND LOOKING THINGS UP WHEN YOU DON'T) different idiomatic phrases and words you might not be familiar with. And good grief, don't hesitate to ASK the author if it's something you aren't familiar with! No one can know everything. LOL
DeleteCheryl, I have to recheck my historical manuscripts for the word "Okay," since t wasn't used in the 19th century.
ReplyDeleteOn the funny side, I once watched a Black & White B-rated medieval movie starring Richard Burton as a gladiator. In one scene he walked int a tent, pulled his sword and exclaimed, "Son of a gun!"
Laurean (I always say your name in my head as you explain on your website LOL), my entymology dictionary says okay was used in 1840 to indicate approval and 1888 as authorization.
DeleteHi Laurean, yes Caroline is right--I know because I had to TWRP many years ago.
DeleteThat is hilarious about "Son of a gun!" Who thought THAT was a good idea? LOL Thanks for stopping by!
Cheryl, anachronisms pull me out of a story, too. Even words or phrases that were used in other eras sometimes have new meanings or current uses that makes them seem anachronistic. Remember John Denver saying, "Amazing!" as an example. If I were to have a character say that, readers who were around during Denver's lifetime might think of it as anachronistic. Same with fantastic. Writing is complicated, isn't it? Obviously editing is too.
ReplyDeleteHi Caroline! Yes, they do me, too! We really have to just be so careful, and even so, sometimes those things slip in!
DeleteI know that somewhere in one of my stories I probably wrote a modern day phrase because I believe I've made every mistake that can be made at least once. LOL
ReplyDeleteI good article, Cheryl, because we all need reminding to pay attention to the phrases we use in historical writing. We often count on excellent editors like you to catch our mistakes, but we certainly need to be attentive to these details. Writing historical works is a challenge.
Oh, Sarah, believe me, I've made my own mistakes in this vein, as well! Who hasn't? LOL And it's always easier to see immediately when other people do it, but not when we do it ourselves. LOL
Delete